Oh my goodness, what's that? - the most common response when I fling wide the curtains to the alcove where we keep our Mobiliser - our hidden gem - at Victory.
I think I'm probably one of the Mobiliser's longest-term users, and - spoiler - I'm a big fan. I was first introduced to it in 2004 by several of my patients (after the third patient in a month came to tell me about it, I figured I should really go and have a look). I subsequently managed to get one in most of the random places I was posted; I bought one for my sister when she qualified as a helicopter pilot; and I got one for Victory as soon as we had enough space. (The team know that if they ever can't find me and I'm not with a patient, they should check the Mobi...)
But what is it?
Well - it's essentially a 7 foot mat with knobbly motorised rollers. You lie on it, on your back; you press a button; and for 15 minutes the rollers work themselves up and down your body underneath you, stretching your joints, massaging your muscles and gently warming your torso with carbon heating filaments. (And at Victory we also offer you an eye mask, ear plugs and a blanket so that if you want to, you can really disappear from the world for 15 minutes - bliss!)
Where a physio or massage therapist focuses on the bit that hurts (or the bit that causes other bits to hurt), the Mobi provides a sort of equal-opportunities treatment. It's actually an ideal complement to a treatment session (either before or after). When you're relatively new to it (the first 20-odd sessions), we definitely recommend using the cushioning pad under your torso; but as you get more used to the Mobi, more flexible - and, dare I say it, more masochistic - you may find you want it to go deeper, and that's when you can take the pad off. I've been known to fall asleep on an unpadded Mobi... just saying!
It's not suitable for everyone. People who are at the hypermobile end of the spectrum and who haven't done serious core training, can get flared up. You guys should definitely take up Pilates first! Similarly, pregnant women (producing the hormone relaxin, which results in lax ligaments) should approach the Mobi with caution; as should people with osteoporosis or recent injuries. But the rest of us, with stiff grumbly backs? Heavenly - and in some cases, it's been shown to reduce recovery times and even reduce the need for physio!
At Victory, we offer an induction session with one of our therapists for just £25, after which you can just book a 30-minute slot and use it on your own for £20, whenever the clinic is open. (Just make sure you do book in advance, otherwise you might find you have to push me off before you can get on!)
And - until the end of April 2017, we're offering 30% off all Mobi inductions, so what are you waiting for? Call us on 0207 175 0150 to book yours now!